by Delaney Matthew
Goosebumps rose along Lilah’s skin every evening just before nightfall. She’d bite her fingernails, tasting the salty skin beneath them while waiting for the loud crash to ripple through the house as the sun set. The sky always seemed so big, so heavy, surely it would level out her bedroom in one fell swoop. Her dolls didn’t deserve to be crushed; she took good care of them,
just like her parents said to.
She liked the sun though…it rose, going up and up over the house. The only ones who had to worry then were airplanes; she hadn’t been on an airplane before. When she saw the sun, her chest stopped hurting like when she had a cough or stomach flu…until the sky turned purple and orange again and the pain came back.
One night, her fingernails short and jagged, she asked her dad, “Will it hurt when the night falls on us?”
He paused at her question and his eyebrow knitted together into one fine line like an unraveled strand her mom cut from her tutu after she got it caught on the doorframe. Finally as he pulled her covers to her chin he said, “Don’t worry, kid. The night’s not going to fall, I’ll always hold it up for you. Remember how you sat on my shoulders at the zoo? They’re strong, huh?”
She nodded and he ruffled her hair and that satisfied Lilah for a long time. That’s what dads were supposed to do, right? And her dad was really tall, he was closer to the sky than anyone else she knew.
When the sun faded each night, Lilah would find him.
“I got it, you go to sleep,” he would say with a smile.
Even though it was fun, she never sat on his shoulders again after that, he had too much to carry already.
Lilah got bigger and stars filled her father’s eyes as time went on. But no matter how much he changed, or where she went, he never faltered. In the darkness, he was there for her, shouldering the boulder like Sisyphus. Keeping everything in place.
Then her daylight betrayed her.
When her father died, Lilah watched the clock all day, bracing herself like she once did many moons ago. And as the sun set, her world crashed to the ground without him.
Delaney L. Mathew (she/her) is a writer from the Youngstown, Ohio area who focuses mainly on supernatural and horror literature. She’s a graduate of Youngstown State University and works full-time as a retail manager. When not working, Delaney can be found at literary events hosted by Lit Youngstown or writing her first novel which has a supernatural take on the stages and effects of grief. Her short stories are featured in publications by Jenny Magazine, Minds Eyes Publications, and Wicked Shadow Press. Check out dlmathew.com for more info!