I Open My Eyes to Dark

by Holly Day

He calls at three a.m. and reads one of my poems
over the answering machine, says, “I like that one,” before
hanging up, and I’m left, sitting on the floor, arms around my knees
wondering what would happen if I had picked up the phone.
In the other room, the father of the child inside me
groans in his sleep, calls out to someone in the dark
probably not me. I don’t know why I’m still here, why

I don’t answer the phone calls of this man who says
he needs me, says we belong together, says
it could work. I imagine myself showing up on his doorstep
a ridiculous wide-brimmed hat and flowered dress
belly swollen with the baby I can’t bear not to keep
everything I own shoved into a suitcase too heavy
for someone in my condition to carry. I imagine his face

when he realizes that I mean to stay,
that he has to let me stay because
there’s nowhere else I can go.


Holly Day has taught writing classes at the Loft Literary Center in Minnesota, since 2000. Her published books include Music Theory for Dummies, Music Composition for Dummies, Guitar All-in-One for Dummies, Piano All-in-One for Dummies, Walking Twin Cities, Insider’s Guide to the Twin Cities, Nordeast Minneapolis: A History, and The Book Of, while her poetry has recently appeared in Oyez Review, SLAB, and Gargoyle. Her newest poetry book, Ugly Girl, just came out from Shoe Music Press.