How Did Dinosaurs Have Sex?
Like great astrological events
in a sixth-grade dream
Uranus aligns with Jupiter
to spawn meteors and moons.
Or just a cloaca for the necessary
comings-and-goings, a squirt affair–
for dinosaurs, like many birds,
probably did not have penises–
just spurted off in the right direction.
Ah, the problems of ejaculation
when the dominant species weighs tons and tons.
My twelve-year-old son wants to know
if they floated on the lake or lay face to face?
Perhaps on their sides, I say,
so those great protective plates
couldn’t come between.
Let’s imagine it as the union
of a morbidly obese medieval knight
with a two-ton Valkyrie, and we understand
what chain mail does to intimacy–
the complaint, I explain, of body builders,
so much armor between it and it.
He doesn’t blush and I continue
the sex lesson for the day.
Except for the problem of propagation,
the mechanics is not important.
It’s the foreplay, the strut and posture
along the Jurassic shore
to secure the dinosaur race
which, alas, didn’t make it
as we may not either.
Do be careful.